The Longer You’re Married...
The more you dislike their CRUNCHING sounds
When we were dating, I don’t think I ever heard him crunch a single chip, pretzel, or bite of cereal. Fourteen years later, I can hear him crunching a tortilla chip from the kitchen down the hall, through our bedroom, and into our closet, ha! Infatuation covers a multitude of habits, but love keeps perspective on petty issues.
You realize GRACE is so much easier than GRUDGES
It doesn’t matter if they never replace the toilet paper roll or if they have hurt you much deeper, holding a grudge is painful. Grace is so much easier to extend than to hold onto the hurt and keep a grudge. The enemy wants to turn little things like toilet paper rolls into big issues, and he wants to take hurtful moments and let them sit like an infection in your heart. But we get to choose to let it go and embrace grace. We must learn to let grace be a cyclical gift in marriage, I’ve received it, and I give it over and over and over.
You understand LOVE is more than something you FEEL, it is something you DO
Yes, love is something we feel towards our spouse, but true love moves beyond a feeling and into action. Love is serving one another day in and day out. Love is the teamwork it takes to make marriage and family last. Feelings can fool us, we can feel love so passionately one day and the next the feeling is missing in action. When we don’t feel love if we keep serving, love will always be present.
You recognize DATE NIGHT is important
Date night can look different for everyone. Budget, time, tired, or whatever else should never be an excuse. When we were first married, we had no money and were exhausted, but almost every night, we sat down together, talked, and enjoyed a short TV show together. Fourteen years later, that is still our favorite thing to do together. Just the two of us talking and watching a show. Yes, we do go on other dates occasionally, but this is what works for us. I know others who have a weekly outing as their date night. It’s important to find what works for you and do that because the goal is to like each other still after your kids are gone.
You see AGING is ATTRACTIVE
When Brad and I got married, he was the most attractive man to me, and I was the most beautiful woman to him. But I look back at our wedding photos and look at us now and he more attractive now than he has ever been. There are a little less muscle and a little greyer hair, but there is a man who continually strives to be the best man he can be for our boys and me. It’s a beautiful thing to see years of love and effort show up in wrinkles on our faces and grey on heads.
Marriage is a beautiful gift from God, but it takes grit, effort, and grace.
If you are divorced, let the goodness of God heal your heart and embrace the future He has planned for you.
If you are single, passionately pursue Christ, His goodness will prepare your heart and will lead you to your perfect match in time. Don’t hurry, wait for the one, it is so worth it.
If you are married, 1 month or 75 years, share with me something you’ve learned in marriage.
God is so good to give us the gift of love, let us choose to embrace His love for us so that we can better love those around us.
Happy 14th Anniversary to my FAVORITE guy!
